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Writer's pictureJohn Black

I will not ask you to tell me about your childhood OR What to expect from therapy.





There are so many misconceptions about therapy, unfortunately. Many derived from Hollywood films and they bear virtually no relation to reality. Embarking on the journey of therapy can feel like stepping into the unknown. With so many misconceptions and uncertainties, it’s natural to wonder what therapy truly involves and what you can expect from it. Let me demystify the process and explore what therapy can offer you, weaving through the potential benefits, experiences, and personal growth it facilitates.


The First Step: Seeking Help


Deciding to seek therapy is a courageous and significant first step. It signifies a recognition that you want to make changes, gain insights, or receive support for challenges you’re facing. This initial phase often involves finding a therapist who feels like a good fit for you. It’s akin to choosing a guide for a deeply personal journey, so take your time to find someone whose approach resonates with you.


The Initial Sessions: Building Rapport


Therapy typically begins with an initial assessment, where your therapist will ask questions to understand your background, current issues, and goals. This phase is crucial for building rapport and trust. Think of it as laying the foundation for a strong therapeutic relationship. You'll get to know each other, and you’ll have the opportunity to ask questions and express any concerns.

In these early sessions, expect a lot of talking from both sides. Your therapist will gather information and, more importantly, listen. They are there to understand your story, your struggles, and your aspirations. This process might feel a bit like an interview, but it’s a vital step in tailoring the therapy to your unique needs.


Setting Goals: Defining the Path


Once you’ve established a baseline understanding, you and your therapist will begin to set goals. These can be specific, such as reducing anxiety symptoms, or broader, like improving overall wellbeing. Goal-setting provides direction and purpose to your sessions, ensuring that the therapy is focused and effective.

Goals in therapy are not set in stone. They can evolve as you progress and gain new insights. Sometimes, what you thought you wanted to achieve may change as you uncover deeper layers of your experiences and emotions.


The Therapeutic Process: Engaging with Techniques


  • Solution Focused Hypnotherapy (SFH) is a modern, dynamic approach combining psychotherapy and hypnotherapy to promote positive change. Unlike traditional therapy, which often delves into past issues, SFH focuses on the present and future, encouraging clients to envision their best possible selves and work towards that goal.

    At the heart of SFH is the principle of solution-focused brief therapy (SFBT). This means that sessions are geared towards identifying and amplifying solutions rather than dissecting problems. It’s about harnessing your existing strengths and resources to overcome challenges. Think of it as a collaborative effort where the therapist guides you to tap into your own potential.



  • The hypnotherapy component involves guiding you into a deeply relaxed state, akin to daydreaming. In this state, your mind is more receptive to positive suggestions. It’s a bit like reprogramming your brain to focus on constructive thoughts and behaviours. This deep relaxation helps to reduce anxiety, enhance clarity, and foster a sense of calm and wellbeing.

    A typical SFH session starts with a conversation about what you want to achieve. The therapist will ask you to describe your preferred future and the steps you think might help you get there. This positive envisioning is crucial as it sets a clear direction for your subconscious mind to follow.



  • Next, through hypnosis, your therapist will help reinforce these positive images and plans. The trance state is safe and natural, and you remain in control throughout. You might feel a deep sense of relaxation and calm, emerging from the session feeling refreshed and focused.

    Solution Focused Hypnotherapy is empowering. It’s about moving forward, building on your strengths, and creating a brighter, more confident future. Whether you’re dealing with stress, anxiety, or simply want to enhance your wellbeing, SFH offers a practical, positive approach to help you thrive.



Your therapist will tailor their approach based on what they believe will work best for you. They might use a blend of these methods, adapting as needed to ensure you’re progressing towards your goals.


The Emotional Rollercoaster: Navigating Feelings


Therapy is not always a smooth ride. It’s an emotional journey that can sometimes feel like a rollercoaster. There will be sessions where you feel relieved, lighter, and more hopeful. Other times, delving into painful memories or confronting difficult truths can be challenging and exhausting.

It’s important to remember that these ups and downs are a normal part of the process. Therapy provides a safe space to experience and process these emotions. Your therapist is there to support you through the highs and lows, helping you to navigate your feelings and make sense of them.


Insights and Breakthroughs: Moments of Clarity


One of the most rewarding aspects of therapy is the moments of insight and breakthrough. These are the "aha" moments when something clicks, and you gain a new understanding of yourself or your situation. These insights can lead to profound changes in how you think, feel, and behave.

Breakthroughs can come at any time. Sometimes they happen during a session when you’re talking something through. Other times, they might occur between sessions as you reflect on what you’ve discussed. These moments can be incredibly empowering, providing clarity and a sense of direction.


Developing Skills: Building a Toolkit


Therapy equips you with practical skills and tools to manage your emotions, cope with stress, and navigate life’s challenges. These might include:

  • Stress Management Techniques: Such as deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, and mindfulness meditation.

  • Communication Skills: Learning how to express yourself more clearly and assertively.

  • Problem-Solving Strategies: Developing ways to tackle issues more effectively.

  • Emotional Regulation: Techniques to help you manage and respond to your emotions in healthier ways.

These skills are not just useful in therapy but can be applied to various aspects of your life, improving your overall functioning and wellbeing.


Building Resilience: Strengthening Inner Resources


Over time, therapy helps you build resilience – the ability to bounce back from adversity. By understanding yourself better and developing coping strategies, you become more equipped to handle future challenges. Resilience is about fostering a sense of inner strength and confidence, knowing that you have the tools and support to manage whatever comes your way.


Termination: Reflecting on Progress


Eventually, there will come a time when you and your therapist decide that it’s appropriate to end your sessions. This is often referred to as the termination phase. It’s a time to reflect on your progress, celebrate your achievements, and discuss strategies for maintaining your gains.

Ending therapy can be bittersweet. While it signifies that you’ve made significant progress, it can also feel like saying goodbye to a trusted ally. However, remember that therapy is a step in your journey, not the destination. The skills and insights you’ve gained will stay with you, helping you continue to grow and thrive.


Beyond Therapy: Continuing the Journey


Therapy doesn’t end when you leave the therapist’s office. The real work continues as you apply what you’ve learned to your everyday life. You’ll carry forward the insights, skills, and resilience you’ve developed, using them to navigate new challenges and opportunities.

Many people find that the benefits of therapy extend long after their sessions have ended. It can be a transformative experience, leading to lasting changes in how you view yourself and the world around you.


In Summary


Therapy is a deeply personal and transformative journey. It’s a space where you can explore your thoughts and feelings, gain new insights, develop practical skills, and build resilience. While the process can be challenging at times, it’s also incredibly rewarding. By seeking therapy, you’re taking a proactive step towards greater self-understanding and wellbeing. Embrace the journey with an open heart and mind, and you’ll discover the profound benefits it can bring to your life. If you would like to explore this further with a free initial consultation do get in touch.

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